Nothing to See Here…

I think I’ve told you before that I have a soft spot for my Jadie.  She is such an understated kid most the time, a deep thinker.  But when she muddles over something, what she comes up with on the other side never fails to amuse me.

I thought I’d share a few Jadie anecdotes with you all, so you can be just as amused and impressed with her as I am.  If you hang in through the anecdotes, I promise to give you an update on my husband’s balls and my fat ass.  No, don’t run away!  I swear it won’t be as un-inviting as it sounded just there.  I’ll try to make it interesting.  Plus I need your input on something.

First, my Jadie.  She is 6 and she’s really quite brilliant.  Last weekend, she and I went to get our nails done together.  I had been out of town all the previous week and wanted to give her some one on one time.  After the nail salon, we had lunch.  I mentioned to her that I would be leaving to go out of town again on Monday.  She was a little sad.  This is the conversation that ensued:

Jae:  Why do you have to leave so much lately?

Me:  Well, you know how my company is getting bought by this other company?  There is a lot of work to do and I’m in charge of this pretty big project.

Jae:  Did you volunteer?

Me:  Well, not exactly.  I was minding my own business surfing the web and…  I think maybe I just knew how to do this stuff pretty well so they wanted me to do it.

Jae:  So they picked you because you were good at your job?

Me:  Yeah, I guess so.

Jae:  Well, maybe you could stop being good at your job and they won’t pick you.

Me: (laughing)  Well, I sort of need to get a paycheck to be able to help support our family, pay the bills.  I can’t do a bad job at work or else they would fire me.

Jae: (thinking)  How about you just do a little bad at your job.  Not a lot bad - not so bad that you’d get fired.  But just a little bad so they don’t pick you.

Should I have replied “I tried that, honey, I really did.”  haha  My girl - she’s encouraging me to embrace mediocrity.  I’m so proud.

Would you like another example of her depth and brilliance?  While I was out of town this week, my husband took the three girls to the funeral parlor because the very nice elderly man next door died.  We loved Donald and felt it was important to give the girls a chance to say good-bye.  The 11 year old didn’t have the heart to go up to the casket, but the 6 year old did and she cried seeing Donald, but afterwards she was proud of herself.  She called me when they got home:

Jae:  I did it, Mommy.  I went up to see Dead Donald.  Even Sarah wouldn’t go.  I cried when I was done seeing him.

Me:  I’m proud of you, Honey.

Jae:  You’re proud of me for crying?

Me:  I’m proud of you for saying good-bye.  And yes, I’m proud of you for crying, too.  It’s healthy to show your emotions like that.

Jae:  (thinking)  Well, how come when I get in trouble for misbehaving and I show my emotions, you don’t think it’s healthy?  You just get mad at me.

Me:  That only happens when Mommy has had too much tequila, Honey.  Er, um, is that your dad calling me?

My husband is still recovering.  I was in another city earlier this week and got a cryptic text message.  It said “Everything works.  19 more to go.”  Can you decipher it?  If so, perhaps you’ll get a chuckle.

And news from the front lines… I have mailed in all my paperwork to the obesity surgical center and I have scheduled an executive health exam to provide all the bloodwork and other medical check-up results needed prior to the procedure.  It’s still weeks, maybe even months, away, but I am moving forward.  I have found a message board that I have been following to better understand the procedure, the options, the challenges, the way of life after.  I’ve been reading a few blogs.  I know this will be hard, so hard, but I’m convinced it is what I need to do.  My choice is for lap-band and I intend to have it done as soon as I am able.  No more watching from the sidelines. 

My question is this - do I tell the children?  As you may know, my sweet little Jadie, my special girl, well, she is a chubby one.  We aren’t doing a very good job of helping her to maintain, I guess.  We try but evidently not hard enough.  She is 84 pounds now at not even 6 1/2 years old.  Jadie doesn’t yet really realize that she is overweight and I’m OK with that.  The things we do apply to the whole household, not just to her.  We never single her out for diet or exercise - it’s a family affair only.  She will no doubt face teasing at some point (heck, she has in the past, she just doesn’t remember it).  If I lose weight through this surgical tool, will that make her feel badly about herself if the day comes where she feels fat, knowing that she doesn’t have that same option?  Will she feel bad about being overweight when she realizes that Mommy went through surgery to avoid being overweight? 

I think it will be so difficult to keep it secret - it will be obvious I’m eating very differently.  There will be issues as I adjust.  I will surely lose weight more rapidly than I would have without it.  I know my mom and sister and friends will know and may comment or ask questions.  It’s my inclination to be forthright and honest about such things.  My only concern in this case is how it could affect my precious girl. 

And so I open it up to the Internet - what do you think?  Talk to me.

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