Dec 14 2005
Is your sports jacket comfortable? Can I get your brief case some coffee?
Why is it that airports bring out my snarkiness more than any other place on earth? It’s like the worst of humanity can be found in an airport. People who come to a dead stop in the middle of the fast moving concourse, for example (you’re getting the heel-crunch, asshole).
What bugs me almost more than that are the people who prioritize their extended personal space preferences over the comfort of other human beings.
IF YOU ARE IN A GATE AREA AND IT’S CROWDED WITH PEOPLE STANDING AROUND AND EVEN SITTING ON THE FLOOR, MOVE YOUR CRAP OFF THE CHAIR!!!
“Sir? Is anyone sitting there?”
“Yes.”
30 minutes later, I knew he was full of shit. It was his coat and scarf and newspaper sitting there. Move your crap and let me sit down, mother-effer!! (I’m just so assertive and downright abusive in my mind, but none of it seems to make it out of my mouth).
Oh, your laptop case is Italian leather? Aw, how wonderful. We wouldn’t want that dead cow skin to get scuffed up by resting on the floor now, would we? Here, let me lower my fat ass (covered with live human skin) to the floor instead.
Chairs are for people, dammit. People come before your stuff.
I scowled just enough and scarf-and-newspaper man got up and left. Ha! So now I can rant in my little blog.
Oops, they’re boarding… gotta go!
