Nothing to See Here…

First of all, what is a meme? Isn’t it a groomed white poodle with a pink bow in its hair? Could someone PLEASE tell me what it is? I mean, I’m not an idiot - I can kind of tell from the context of its use, but I’m still at a loss to make the connection. Maybe I need the netymology of the word (did I just make that up? net + etymology = netymology … it’s pretty darn good even if it’s not original).

OK, now on to how I’ve gotten this blogging thing all wrong.

I really should have spent more time coming up with a cool and catching screenname/penname/moniker/handle/psyuedonym/whatever. I mean, “Just Linda” is pretty damn boring. And then, of course, there are the coordinating family names. I knew nothing about this expectation. I suppose I can go with JustSpouse and then JustChild1 - JustChild5. It lacks pizzazz! It doesn’t reach out and grab you! And yet I don’t expect any of you to remember their NAMES when I, their own mother, cannot even do that.

Speaking of not reaching out and grabbing, look at my banner?!?!?! It has FLOWERS on it for god’s sake. There isn’t a martini glass in sight. Why didn’t I get the memo????

OK, maybe we’re stuck with JustLinda because, well, I’m not starting over again (unless you convince me otherwise). But just because my boring chosen name is JustLinda doesn’t mean I can’t come up with something hip and cool and catchy for my banner, does it? I mean, really… “Nothing to See Here” is hardly going to draw anyone in (unless, oh, yes - maybe reverse psychology…).

Not only that, but go out and google “justlinda” and see what you get. Yeah, please don’t confuse me with any of them. Well, it would appear that justlinda dot com might be a wee bit naughty. Know how I know that? I tried to open the site here at my office. Yeah, I got one of those “reminders” about how certain sites are not allowed. I’m expecting the IT guys to come to my office any minute. There are also other justlinda blogs, there are alcoholic justlindas and lesbian justlindas and depressed justlindas. There is a justlinda in Iowa who sells dolly blankets and pillows.

Let me assure you (as if you’re out there googling me, right…) that I am NONE of those justlindas (especially not the dolly pillow and blanket maker). This is the first and only place I’ve used this moniker. And now I feel sooooo unoriginal it’s making me want to slit my wrists (ok, so maybe I AM the depressed justlinda, plus I’ve never done another chick so who knows if I could be the lesbian justlinda, really).

So, besides needing to know what a meme is, I have a few other questions I’d love to have answered:

1. What is the history of your name? Is the screenname you use the same as the blog name?

2. Have you changed names since you first started blogging? If so, was there an order to it (i.e. maybe use google to first determine that it is unique and then see if the domain is available and register it, etc.)? Was it a pain to change?

3. Does it effing MATTER? Am I stressing out my few brain cells on something totally stupid? (Please note, I have five children and I’m TIRED. I don’t LOSE SLEEP over this stuff. In fact, I’ve fallen dead asleep twice while typing this post. If I’ve given you the impression that I’m stressed for real, then, well, that explains where the 9 year old gets her dramatic streak from).

4. I’ve already forgotten what number four was. OK, your first assignment - make up a question for me and then provide the answer. See? I’m completely unessential to this process.

And just for grins, because, well, it’s MY blog (that’s part of what attracted me to it, really), here are some pictures of JustChildren #3 through #5.